Song Parodies!
by SailorAeris
Summary: Parodies of songs about Professor Snape and his class
1. Song1: Potions Class

Well, here it is, my first attempt at a parody, or a fic of any kind really. Let me know how ya like it, or why you don't like it. And thank you for reading it.  
  
I OWN NOTHING! The only thing I originally created were the lyrics of the parody and that was based off of the song that belongs to The Barenaked Ladies Called "Alcohol" off of their album Stunt. I also most certainly do not own Professor Snape. He is a creation of J.K. Rowling, author of Harry Potter ```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````` `````` Lyric Parody by Sailor Aeris:  
  
Potions Class  
  
Potions Class, I'm learning about alchemy Potions Class, a passing grade necessity Potions Class, alternative to chemistry in a lab Oh Potions Class a good grade I will have  
  
I love this book more, than I did the chapter before I discovered Severus  
  
"Potions Class totally rocks"  
  
  
  
Forget Professor Dumbledor screw Professor Sprout I don't care if they all die he's the only one I care about  
  
Potions Class your draughts resolve like my homework never will Oh Potions Class, that draught has made me ill.  
  
I love this book more, than I did the chapter before I discovered Severus  
  
Oh Professor Snape will you please forgive me I forgot my homework again No prob., I'm a Slytherin!  
  
I thought that Professor Snape was a child abusing looser with nothing else to do I thought that Potions Class was bunch of crap I'd never have to use  
  
But now I know that Snape kicks but and so does Potions Class too; even if Snape's hair really makes me wanna puke!  
  
(Chanting) Potion, potion, potion (x48)  
  
I love this book more Than I did the chapter before I discovered Serverus  
  
And would you please ignore that I dropped a flask on the floor and burned a hole in the in the stone  
  
Oh Professor Snape Would you even forgive me if I forgot my homework again if I weren't in Slytherin?  
  
(Would you please forgive me? Would you please forgive me?)  
  
************************** Original Lyrics by The Barenaked Ladies:  
  
Alcohol  
  
Alcohol, my permanent accessory Alcohol, a party time necessity Alcohol, alternative to feeling like yourself Oh alcohol I still drink to your health  
  
I love you more, Than I did the week before I discovered alcohol  
  
"That's what I'm talking about"  
  
Forget the cafe lattes Screw the raspberry iced tea A Malibu and Coke for you A G and T for me  
  
Alcohol, your songs resolve Like my life never will When someone else is picking up the bill  
  
I love you more Than I did the week before I discovered alcohol  
  
Oh alcohol Would you please forgive For while I cannot love myself I'll use something else  
  
I thought that alcohol Was just for those with nothing else to do I thought that drinking just to get drunk Was a waste of precious booze  
  
But now I know that there's A time and theres a place where I can choose To walk the fine line between self-control and self-abuse  
  
```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````` So, that's it. My little parody in honor of Professor Snape. I hope it made sense and was enjoyable. If it was, or was not, please review and let me know. Thank you for reading my first 'fic'. See ya! Sailor Aeris 


	2. Song2: As We Mix

I don't like this parody as much as the other, but oh well. It's my second attempt at fan fiction so I'm sorry if it sucks. It is a parody of the song 'When You Dream' by the Barenaked Ladies from their album 'Stunt'. I hope you enjoy it!  
  
Again, I OWN NOTHING except the parody lyrics. The song and lyrics belong to the Barenaked Ladies and Professor Snape does not belong to me either. Darn.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Parody Lyrics by Sailor Aeris  
  
When You Mix  
  
With class just begun, Our assignment won't be fun, with mixing things that have long been dead  
  
With flutter and dart, we get out eel hearts, and toss them into our culdrens  
  
It's hard to believe, as we get our bat wings, what kind of potion this will be  
  
As we mix, up all of these strange things, As we mix, what are we mixing up?  
  
Do you mix Do you mix up old mucus or ears of rabits, or pieces of ogres' eyes?  
  
Do you stir in muggle kleenex, or Golgi Apparatus, or cat tails that are all dry?  
  
It's fun when newt noses come to life again and wiggle their way to th floor  
  
And when class is closed, we all ready know he'll hand us homework before we get out the door  
  
And when we get back in, awe'll check it soon as class begins, and go back to our culdrens  
  
As we mix, what are we mixing up?  
  
Should it be chilled or heated up, yellowish or greenish, or colorless as not to be seen?  
  
Do I add wolves' bane, or should it be fish veins, again, should I use heat?  
  
"With so little experience, your minds are inferior", agrily says Snape everyday.  
  
When we mix, what are we mixing up? When we mi--x, up all of these things  
  
When we mix, what are we mixing up? When we mix (what is this stuff) What are we mixing up?  
  
When we mix, what are we mixing up?  
  
When we mix...  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Original Lyrics by the Barenaked Ladies  
  
When You Dream With life just begun My sleeping new son Has eyes that roll back in his head They flutter and dart He slows down his heart And pictures a world past his bed  
  
It's hard to believe As I watch you breathe Your mind drifts and weaves  
  
When you dream What do you dream about  
  
When you dream What do you dream about  
  
Do you dream about music Or mathematics Or planets too far for the eye?  
  
Do you dream about Jesus Or quantum mechanics Or angels who sing lullabyes?  
  
His fontanelle pulses With lives that he's lived With memories he'll learn to ignore And when it is closed He already knows He's forgotten all he knew before  
  
But when sleep sets in History begins But the future will win  
  
When you dream What do you dream about?  
  
When you dream What do you dream about?  
  
Are they colored or black and white Yiddish or English or languages not yet conceived? Are they silent or boisterous? Do you hear noises Just loud enough to be perceived?  
  
Do you hear Del Shannons "Runaway" (link to Del Shannon) Playing on transistor radio waves? With so little experience You might not get cognicent Are you wise beyond your few days?  
  
When you dream What do you dream about? (REPEAT CHORUS)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Well there it is, chapter/song two. Let me know what you think of it. Thank you to Laurie Lupin and Chasing Snape is my hobby for their reviews!  
  
I may add more latter, perhaps from a different band, or not. Thanks for reading this! 


	3. Song 3: These Bertie Botts

Yet another poor parody of a Barenaked Ladies song. This one is about Harry Potter's veiw on Professor Snape and his potions class. This one is a parody of their song "These Apples" off of their live album 'Rock Spectecal'. (It's on another album aswell, but I can't remember which one). As I've stated before, I don't own anything, but I did make up the lyrics alone, so I guess I sort of own them. **I would like to appologise, but like in the other parodies, some lines are a bit too long to fit in to the music smoothly with out being said very quickly. Sorry. ** If you have any corrections to make about any of my work, please let me know about them at my e-mail address: sara86@msn.com _________________________________________________________  
  
Parody Lyrics by Sailor Aeris  
  
These Bertie Botts  
  
He gave me a mandrake, said it was fatal  
  
I've never been good with plants.  
  
Next presentation at me he threw a dictionary,  
  
'circled the word "dumb***"  
  
Unentusiastic, not very drastic, I wrote his name on the test  
  
and when he beheld it, he said I misspelled it, 10 points from the whole class  
  
These Bertie Botts are delicious, "As a matter of fact they aren't" he said  
  
What flavor is the green?  
  
Gave us a pile homework as thick as a text book book  
  
I was sure I would fail  
  
I did it all carefully, turned it in on time  
  
and passed by his grading scale  
  
Never been frightened of being enlightened  
  
but some lectures go to far (to far to far)  
  
Sometimes I stammer, or mix up my grammer  
  
and it makes me pick my scar  
  
These Bertie Botts are delicious, "As a matter of fact they aren't" he said  
  
What flavor is the green? (Greeeeee----n)  
  
Didn't mean to get every question on the test wrong  
  
'just wanna pass the class  
  
Sometimes he is just too darn headstrong  
  
'Wish that he would just get fired  
  
I hope it's soon  
  
Wondering what evil plan he's conspired  
  
What's he conspired?  
  
What's he conspired?  
  
These Bertie Botts are delicious. "As a matter of fact they aren't" he said.  
  
What flavor is the green? (Kelp?)  
  
__________________________________________________  
  
Original Lyrics by Barenaked Ladies  
  
'These Apples'  
  
A friend brought me flowers, she said they were lilacs  
  
But I've never been good with plants  
  
Her next presentation, a new dictionary  
  
She'd circled the word "romance"  
  
So enthusiastic, a little bit drastic  
  
I shaved her name in my head  
  
And as she beheld it, she said I misspelled it;  
  
Need more be said?  
  
[Chorus:]  
  
These apples are delicious!  
  
"As a matter of fact they are," she said  
  
Can all this fruit be free?  
  
She wrote me a letter as big as a phonebook  
  
I've never been big on mail  
  
I sent her a postcard from somewhere near Lethebridge  
  
And wondered if it still went by rail  
  
  
  
I've never been frightened of being enlightened  
  
But some things can go too far  
  
Though sometimes I stammer and mix up my grammar,  
  
You get what my meanings are  
  
[Chorus]  
  
I'm not trying to sing a love song - I'm trying to sing in tune.  
  
I know I am sometimes headstrong  
  
Falling love, catching fire - I want to be consumed  
  
Wondering will I ever tire, will I ever tire??  
  
[Chorus] _____________________________________ Well, there's Chapter 3. If you have any requests, comments, questions, or corrections to make, please write a review! Thank you for reading this! NOTE: I will be changing the name of this fanfic soon. 


	4. Song 4: Year Five

Once again, I own nothing.  
  
(I'll try Enid sometime soon, I've been really busy lately0  
  
Year Five  
  
I found my house and I found my classes  
  
Lost at lunch and I broke my glasses  
  
That guy is huge! Myrtle is wailin'!  
  
First day of school and I'm already failing  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
I've got a blue-and-red magic bag and a remembral-reminder  
  
I'm trying my best not to look like a minor-fiver  
  
I went out for the Quidditich team to prove that I'm a man  
  
I guess I shouldn't tell them that I'm not a big fan  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
Well half my friends are Weaslys and Fred & George are pests  
  
And none of them can help me study for my potions test  
  
Got into the classroom and my knowledge was gone  
  
Guess I should've studied 'stead of sneaking out with Ron  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
(Neville) They called me chicken!  
  
(Harry) They called me four-eyes  
  
(Dudly) They called me fatso  
  
(Hermoine) They called me buck-teeth  
  
(George) They called me Fredy  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
I've got a red velvet cloak and a pair of muggle-ish pants  
  
I put them on and I went to the Yule Ball-dance  
  
McGonnagle said I have to be home by eleven  
  
Aw man it's already going on seven!  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five  
  
This is me in year five, baby, this is me in year five 


End file.
